Great points all around and MoonSylver, I think we all understand your feeling - I know I do. The "come up with an idea, only to get bogged down in some research and/or generation of adequate NPCs/random encounters/plausible threads, etc." can absolutely sap one's enthusiasm, and lead one to abandon the idea for the next bright-and-shiny, only to run up against the exact same problem. Especially if you're limited by time, energy, or both.
I do agree with roryb bracebuckle in that, ultimately, I think we owe ourselves a break - this is supposed to be fun after all. And, if I'm honest with myself, stops-and-starts notwithstanding, I've been more engaged and have learned more about history, game design, probabilities, story creation, myself, etc. than I ever did as a group player, where my only responsibility was to show up once a week.
I wonder if solo role-players aren't perfectionists - we know what we like and we're after that certain type of experience, one we believe we're best able to deliver. Reality can be a bummer in this regard, especially when we realize we need to dial-back our expectations.
To Steven Lincoln's point about exercising his creativity in a different way, I do wonder sometimes if, at the end of the day, I am doing the exact same - engaging the game at a different level, simply enjoying the imaginative process, and immersing myself in the possibilities of a given PC, their time and place, rather than necessarily wanting to engage with the dice. Don't get me wrong, I love the dice as much as the next guy, but in the final analysis, that's not where I'm spending most of my time.
One of the realizations I'm coming to is that I think I really need games and systems that are designed to do what I want right out of the gate.
That was part of my attraction to D&D as my first solo game, that there was SO much material, structure, and support available that I was able to just start PLAYING.
I find myself thinking about a few different games I'd like to go back to or try, but a couple of them don't have the wealth of Random Tables available, so I start thinking of designing all these charts and tables for perceived needs or "cool ideas", but then the anxiety of the current project sets in.
So then I contemplate just sitting down & letting the randomness drive all those kinds of things, but then I fret over "missing something".
For example, "Cryptworld/Chill" is at the top of my list of candidates.
I'd like some way to randomly select monsters so that I don't "miss out" on some of the ones I might not normally think of to use on my own, but in a way that still fits the story or feels a bit "organic".
I get intrigued by the idea, but then skittish of it at the same time, then anxiety sets in at indecision, and increases by getting anxious at getting anxious...
I'm a weird guy and my own worst enemy at times. XD
So I think I need to accept the games the way they are and figure out some way to play them, or approach them, or facilitate them, without designing a bunch of stuff.
The eternal soloist problem I suppose: we all want to just sit down and play without doing a bunch of GM work. :)
roryb bracebuckle Steven Lincoln Excellent posts both of you. Thank you sharing your thoughts.
ReplyDeleteA great point about the pressure we put on ourselves to succeed and persevere, and how hard it is to overcome.
Funny the subject of "Gamer ADD" came up. I have a blog post in mind for that. :)
Great points all around and MoonSylver, I think we all understand your feeling - I know I do. The "come up with an idea, only to get bogged down in some research and/or generation of adequate NPCs/random encounters/plausible threads, etc." can absolutely sap one's enthusiasm, and lead one to abandon the idea for the next bright-and-shiny, only to run up against the exact same problem. Especially if you're limited by time, energy, or both.
ReplyDeleteI do agree with roryb bracebuckle in that, ultimately, I think we owe ourselves a break - this is supposed to be fun after all. And, if I'm honest with myself, stops-and-starts notwithstanding, I've been more engaged and have learned more about history, game design, probabilities, story creation, myself, etc. than I ever did as a group player, where my only responsibility was to show up once a week.
I wonder if solo role-players aren't perfectionists - we know what we like and we're after that certain type of experience, one we believe we're best able to deliver. Reality can be a bummer in this regard, especially when we realize we need to dial-back our expectations.
To Steven Lincoln's point about exercising his creativity in a different way, I do wonder sometimes if, at the end of the day, I am doing the exact same - engaging the game at a different level, simply enjoying the imaginative process, and immersing myself in the possibilities of a given PC, their time and place, rather than necessarily wanting to engage with the dice. Don't get me wrong, I love the dice as much as the next guy, but in the final analysis, that's not where I'm spending most of my time.
Bjorsa Brimrsson Great points all the way around.
ReplyDeleteOne of the realizations I'm coming to is that I think I really need games and systems that are designed to do what I want right out of the gate.
That was part of my attraction to D&D as my first solo game, that there was SO much material, structure, and support available that I was able to just start PLAYING.
I find myself thinking about a few different games I'd like to go back to or try, but a couple of them don't have the wealth of Random Tables available, so I start thinking of designing all these charts and tables for perceived needs or "cool ideas", but then the anxiety of the current project sets in.
So then I contemplate just sitting down & letting the randomness drive all those kinds of things, but then I fret over "missing something".
For example, "Cryptworld/Chill" is at the top of my list of candidates.
I'd like some way to randomly select monsters so that I don't "miss out" on some of the ones I might not normally think of to use on my own, but in a way that still fits the story or feels a bit "organic".
I get intrigued by the idea, but then skittish of it at the same time, then anxiety sets in at indecision, and increases by getting anxious at getting anxious...
I'm a weird guy and my own worst enemy at times. XD
So I think I need to accept the games the way they are and figure out some way to play them, or approach them, or facilitate them, without designing a bunch of stuff.
The eternal soloist problem I suppose: we all want to just sit down and play without doing a bunch of GM work. :)